Woman On A Bench
by Bensonbabe
Summary: Prequel/Doctor's POV of my story Old Man On A Bench. Sylvia's got a problem with Donna and the Doctor's got to fix it. If he knows what's good for him!
1. Prologue

**Woman On A Bench** : a prequel/Doctor's point of view to my story **Old Man On A Bench.** It is a good idea to read that one first. But certainly not necessary. Enjoy! Read and Respond, as needed.

"Thanks for meeting me." Sylvia said.

The Doctor sat down next to her on the bench. "Is there something wrong with Donna? Is she ok?"

"She's fine. Still temp-ing. I don't know why she hasn't found a full time job yet. It's not for lack of trying. But that doesn't concern me."

"Then what does?"

"She's not happy. I see her trying to be. She goes thru the motions like everyone else, I suppose. But her spunk is gone. Are you sure you only took away her memories of you and your travels? Did you take away anything else you shouldn't have?"

"She seemed pretty fired up on the phone the last time I saw her." A faraway look came into his eyes as he remembered the day he brought her back. The day he left her in her old life. The one she hated and tried so desperately to get out of. The guilt of sending her back put a knot in his throat and started to water his eyes again. He swallowed hard and forced himself to concentrate on Sylvia.

"At first she was all fiery," she explained. "But it cooled down. It was so gradual, I hardly noticed it. Well, that's just it. I didn't notice it. My dad did. Donna's his only grandchild. He's doted on her since she was born and he notices everything about her. He mentioned it to me one day and since then I've kept my eye on her. He's right. So, is it possible you erased something you shouldn't have?"

"I don't think so. It's quite an involved process really. One I haven't done in a while, but it's not too hard to forget how to do it. There isn't any way that I could..grab onto something...well, technically, if I had been thinking about ..."

Slap!

The Doctor touched his cheek in surprise. "Ow!" _Like mother like daughter. Blimey._

"Stop rambling! You need to concentrate and answer my question. A simple yes or no is all I need. I'm going to ask you again. Is it possible that you erased something else besides her memories of traveling with you?"

"Ahh...yes. I suppose it is possible. Yes."

"Ok. Now we're getting somewhere. Then how do we determine that you __ _did_ erase something you shouldn't have and what that was?"

"I'd have to physically connect with her again."

"Excuse me? You'd have to what!? 'Physically Connect' with her AGAIN?!"

She looked like she was about to slap him, so he thought it best to quickly explain what he meant.

"No, No it's not like it sounds. I'd press my fingers on either side of her head at her temples and connect my mind to hers. I have to 'physically' touch her to do it. I've done it with...to...her at least… twice."

"That's not going to happen."

"Why?"

She looked at him in disbelief. "Well, I seem to recall that _someone_ told us that if she remembered you, she'd burn up. Now how are you going to 'physically connect" with her and _not_ trigger those memories?"

He started to answer, but nothing came out. She was right. _Blimey. Again._

"Just as I thought. Is there another way to find out?"

"Well, there is, but it's rudimentary and time consuming."

"What is it?"

"It would require a lot of old fashioned observation by someone who knows what they're looking for."

"Is it something I could do?"

"Have you had any training in clinical research?"

"Nope."

"Any training or knowledge of behavioral psychology?"

"None."

"Has your dad had any training in these areas I've mentioned?"

"Nada."

"Well, then no. It looks like I'm the only one qualified to ascertain whether or not I have erased anything that I shouldn't have from Donna's memory."

"Great. A man cleaning up his own mess. Donna would like that. _I_ like that. But how are you going to do that and not let her see you?"

"That, Sylvia," he said as he tapped his sonic screwdriver in his hand, "is the million-dollar question."

L on Z


	2. Prologue 2: Watching & Waiting

' _Sit on a bench at the bus stop', Sylvia said. 'Just watch her from there'. She said. This is soo bloody boring._

The first week of waiting and watching was awful. Who was he kidding! The first hour was the worst! Sitting still for an hour, doing nothing? Like an Ordinary Person? How rubbish is that? Is it any wonder that he fell asleep and missed Donna getting on the bus? He waited around all day for her to get on. When she got off of it unexpectedly, it made him jump. And then she was down the street before he could observe her.

 _Well, that didn't go as planned._

That's not true. He hadn't planned anything. He thought he could just sit there for a day or two and know what was wrong. A week tops!

 _I underestimated how precarious of a situation this is. This is Donna we're dealing with here._

 _One false move and she gets madder than a March hare!_ _  
_ _One false move and she remembers me!_ _  
_ _One false move and...she...burns…_

He stared off into space looking very solemn.

 _Why did I have to think about that?_

* * *

The Doctor was on the bench when Donna got there the next morning. He was hiding behind the morning paper just in case she recognized him. He shouldn't have bothered. She didn't notice anyone. She was texting on her phone the entire time. It was only after she got on the bus that he realized the paper he'd been "reading" was upside down. _Blimey_ _._

And so it went for days on end. Donna came to the bus stop and didn't see a thing.

While he sat. And watched.

Watched her walk. Watched her run her fingers thru her hair. That long ginger hair of hers...

And he listened. Listened to her talk to people.

It was so good to hear her talk. He forgot how much he missed her voice. He'd close his eyes and pretend that the conversations she had were really with him.

They were the best conversations.

* * *

It was clear by about the 3rd month of watching and listening that Donna was the same old Donna. Nothing was that different. He figured that she was subconsciously grieving. And that was what had affected her spunk. He knew she'd heal over time.

He could have stopped watching and waiting and listening. He should have stopped. He intended to stop. But He kept telling himself, _Tomorrow. Tomorrow I'll stop. I just need one more day to be sure…_

"Well, have you figured it out yet?" Asked Sylvia.

"No," he lied. "She's tricky. I'm going to need a lot more time than I thought."

Of course he lied. He wasn't about to tell Sylvia that Donna was fine. He liked seeing her every day. And even though she didn't notice him and he couldn't risk speaking to her, being near her helped him cope with his loneliness. It calmed him.

A year went by. Then two. He lost count after that. It may have been one year or twenty, he really couldn't say. He didn't want to say. Cause then he'd have to give it up. Give her up. And he wasn't about to do that.


	3. Prologue 3: Shut-Down Mode

He sat and watched Donna get on the bus for the umpteenth time. Same as it was yesterday, a week ago, a month ago...same old thing. _She doesn't even know I'm here._

Gloom quickly settled over him. He could feel his body start to shut down. _Here we go_... _Shut-Down Mode_. It did this sometimes. When he couldn't face things anymore. The last time was so long ago. A lifetime ago. When he and Donna followed the Tandoca Trail to the Medusa Cascade only to find nothing. No planets. No companions. No Earth. All that energy expended to get there and they're rewarded with nothing. No payoff. Not a damn thing! That's when his mind told his body, I'm done! Shut-Down mode. AKA "I no longer care"-mode. "I can't do this anymore"-mode. And once in it, it's extremely hard to get out. A phone call brought him out of it then. All his companions reaching out to him at the exact same moment. _What will it be this time?_

A hand rested on his shoulder. "Why are you still here?" Asked Sylvia.

He jumped!

Sylvia stood behind him. "It's freezing out."

"M fine."

"Right. Sure you are. Put these on." She handed him a hat and coat. "Can't have you getting frostbite, now can we?" He put them on reluctantly.

Next she handed him a steaming cup. "Now, drink this tea. And don't argue with me."

He did as he was told.

"You've been sitting in the exact same spot for days now."

He was about to argue with her when she cut him off "Don't try and deny it. I've seen you."

He remained silent for a moment as he thought of a response.

"And your point is?" He asked as he sipped his tea.

"You look like death warmed over."

"And that's bad because...?" He took another sip.

"How are you supposed to help fix Donna when it's clear you can't even take care of yourself?"

He answered her with another sip of his tea.

She patted his shoulder "Think about it." and then left him to his own thoughts while she walked away.

 _She's right_. _Hit the nail on the head! There's no hope for Donna if I get like this. I can't allow myself to enter Shut-Down Mode. It isn't fair to Donna. I've got to try harder._

That's when he felt it. The hairs on the back of his neck stood up indicating that someone was watching him. He looked up and noticed that the bus was still there. It hadn't left. And standing inside it looking right at him was Donna.

 _What?!_


	4. Chapter 1: Recognition?

He waited eagerly the next day for her to come _. Where is she? She's going to miss her bus._

She ran towards him. _Does she see me? Does she know who I am?_

"Oh, Donna," he whispered to himself, "please, please, please, please don't recognize me. I want you to more than anything. But I really need you to NOT, right now."

She ran past him and got on the bus. At least one of his hearts raced to catch up with her. He quelled it by sitting as still as he possibly could. Again he felt the hair on his neck stand up.

 _She sees me!_

This unnerved him more than anything. It felt so good. So right. It filled him with hope. And yet, his stomach tied itself into knots as he contemplated the other outcome of her discovery. He watched her closely for any signs of mental distress. Unfortunately, this remained unclear, because at that moment the bus decided to pull her away from him.

* * *

He paced all day wondering when she was getting off work. Now that she was aware of his presence, how did it affect her mind? He saw the bus approach and felt he better sit down, just in case. _Breathe! Breathe in. Breathe out. That's it. Breathe in. Breathe out._

Screech!

He sucked in a quick breath and held it while Donna got off.

He watched her intently. She was looking thru her bag. Or, more accurately, pretending that she was. _Oh, who does she think she's fooling? I know she's really looking at me. Does she think I'm dead or something?_

He let out the breath he had been holding.

She shuddered.

 _Gotcha!_

"Ugh, hello," she said.

He stared in surprise. _Did she just say hello?_ The silence got a little awkward.

"G- Good night," she said, and turned to go.

 _Do something! She's your best friend, for heaven's sake! Acknowledge that you saw her!_ He grabbed his hat and tipped it towards her.

She hesitated a brief moment and smiled before she walked away.

 _She was smiling!_

Come to think of it, so was he. A lot.

* * *

The bus was running late this morning. He was glad. It gave him a little more time to see how her mind would handle his presence.

She sat down next to him, opened her bag, pulled out two scones and offered one to him. "Want one?"

His stomach growled in response. _She's still taking care of me._ He eyed her closely. She looked a little puzzled so he quickly took the scone and nodded thanks. He tore a chunk off and ate it in an effort to loosen the tightening knot in his throat.

They ate in silence. As each minute passed he could feel the tension ease in every muscle of his body. _Well, that's interesting._ _Is it the scone or her company?_

When the bus finally came, Donna waved goodbye as she got on. He smiled back and held up his half eaten scone in thanks. He sighed. He could feel the tension returning. He tore another chunk off and continued to eat. _This worked before; maybe it would again._

* * *

"My name's Donna. What's yours?"

He just smiled.

"Not going to say, huh? You are a crafty old man, aren't you?"

He laughed. He couldn't help it. He loved how direct she was. _Oh, how I've missed you!_

She shuddered. Then he saw the spark of electricity flow thru her. _Oh no! What have I done!_ He started to panic inside. He poised himself ready to grasp her temples in case an overload of energy was imminent.

She laughed heartily instead. He was so caught off guard that he couldn't help but join her. When the laughter died down, she inhaled a quick breath and warned him "Well, if you won't tell me your name, I'll have to make one up. What shall I call you, then? Tootie Fruity? BusBoy? No, that isn't respectful enough. Bus man? No..."

She looked at him for suggestions. He just shook his head.

"Smiley?"

He considered it and then nodded his approval.

"Smiley it is then." She grabbed her bag and stood up. "Well, Smiley, I gotta get home. See you in the morning?"

He smiled and nodded.

Of course he'd be there. Because something was happening to Donna Noble in front of his eyes. He didn't know how. He didn't know why. But meeting with her on the bench at this bus stop seemed to be healing her mind. It made no sense. Yet there it was.


	5. Chapter 2: Proceed With Caution

He saw Sylvia sitting on the bench as he rounded the corner. She looks a little agitated, like she's been here awhile. I certainly hope she's not in a mood. Sylvia looked nothing like her daughter, but they certainly shared the same fiery temper. He had learned two things about women like this from the time he spent with Donna: one, when in doubt, proceed with caution... and two, just like a volcano, she could blow at any moment without warning.

As he got closer to her, he decided to proceed with caution.

"Does Donna know you're here?" He asked.

"No. She thinks I'm out with Suzette." She abruptly set the clutch she was holding down on the bench next to her. "I can't stay long, 'cause I really am meeting Suzette."

He hesitated, wondering if she was about to blow. Before he could respond, she cut him off.

"Is there something wrong?"

"No, on the contrary, she's…" He sat down next to her. " … Getting better."

"She is!?" Sylvia visibly relaxed. "How do you know?"

"She's talking to me. It came out of nowhere yesterday. She said something and I laughed. I couldn't help it. There was this spark. I saw it course through her whole body. And when she shuddered in response, I thought it ignited her mind for sure. But ..." He wanted to continue and say "I prayed to all the deities my companions have worshipped and believed in over the years, 'Please, your Godliness and Most Honored Ones, don't be so cruel as to make me watch her marvelous light go out in front of me. I have seen too many awful things in my lifetimes, but that image would certainly...destroy me.'" But he couldn't. He couldn't tell her. Because up until that moment he didn't know he felt this way. His eyes widened in realization. A breath caught as one of the hearts in his chest grabbed the other one and twisted. When a tear escaped, he wiped it away and quickly tried to cover this sudden burst of sentiment. "It didn't. She didn't burn. It's like she glowed. It makes no sense."

He rubbed the back of his neck and hoped Sylvia didn't pick up on the magnitude of this emotional display of his.

She hesitated and then said, "Wow." Clearly in shock.

Uncertain if he had covered adequately, he thought it best to change the subject. "She brought me a scone."

This confused her a little. "Oh that's where they went. I made a batch this morning. Should have known she took them. Donna's always had a soft spot for my scones." Sylvia stood up to leave. He stood up too and gazed off into the distance, not wanting to meet her eyes.

"She gave you a scone, did she?" Silvia appraised him up and down and harrumphed. "She must like you. She doesn't share those scones with anyone."

She picked up her clutch from where it rested on the bench. "It sounds reassuring, Doctor, but I'm not going to get my hopes up yet. She may think of you as just a new friend. It's too soon to say for sure. Now, if you'll excuse me, Suzette will be waiting."

"Yes, by all means." He backed away clearing a path for her to his right.

She walked past and turned to look back at him from over her shoulder.

"Oh, and Doctor..."

This time he met her gaze. "Yes?"

"Carry on."

"Yeah," he sighed.


	6. Chapter 3: The Puddle

At first glance the puddle looked shallow. But he knew it was deceptively deep. Watching three people step and topple head-first into the filthy water convinced him of that. He laughed at their misfortune. He shouldn't have. But it was funny.

He held up the umbrella against the rain. He was quite lucky he found it, really. Well..."found it" wasn't exactly the right term. More like "kept it" because _someone_ forgot to put it back in her bag.

Down the lane, not 50 feet from said puddle, came Donna with her bag raised over her head to protect her from the rain. She was swifter than usual. The Doctor assumed she was more concerned with finding shelter than worrying about puddles. He estimated that with her current pace, steps and distance, she was heading straight for that puddle! Now although he liked watching others fall into it, he did _**NOT**_ relish the idea of Donna doing so.

He sprang to his feet immediately.

"You have got to be kidding me!?" she exclaimed.

He grabbed her arm the instant she started to fall. As he pulled her upright he noticed how her wet hair clung to her face. A memory flashed in his mind. One from the first day he met her: Donna stood beside him on top of the Thames Flood Barrier as they surveyed the river. She was dripping wet in her wedding gown with her hair plastered against her skin. The sight made his hearts flutter. This surprised him because he didn't think they would ever do that again (at least, not so soon after losing Rose). He'd remember that moment for the rest of his life! She held onto him back then for support, just like she was doing now. He smiled in response and shifted the umbrella from covering himself to shield her instead.

"Come. Sit." He said and guided her to his dry bench at the bus stop.

"Better?" he asked as she sat down.

"Yes, thank you."

Her teeth were chattering. He pulled off his coat and draped it around her shoulders before he sat next to her. Another memory drifted in. Also from the day they met: they sat on a roof, dangling their feet over the edge while the Tardis cooled down in the background. He placed a ring on her finger and said "With this ring _._ I, thee, bio-damp." _If I had been smart, I should have given you the real thing that day..._

Her blue eyes studied him. He wondered what questions formed behind them. His hearts began to flutter again. A familiar warmth flowed through his veins making his skin tingle. He hadn't felt this way for a very long time _. Do you have any idea how much I love you?_ Her eyes widened and he bit his lip. _Tell me I did_ **not** _just say that out loud?!_

Screech!

 _Blimey! Stupid bus. You have the worst timing!_

He reluctantly got up and helped lift and guide Donna onto the bus. She quietly gave him back his coat and he handed her the umbrella she misplaced the day before.

"Thanks again," she said as she took it.

"Yeah," he said as he winked and gave her a little salute from his right temple with his forefinger as the bus pulled away.

He watched until it was out of sight. The warmth in his veins lingered and burned within him. As he turned to go, he took one foot forward and stepped into something wet and deep.

The puddle!

He fell head-first into the filthy water just as the three others had done before him. A laugh escaped his lips when he raised himself up to his elbows. Then two. Suddenly, he rolled over onto his back and laughed. He opened his arms wide to embrace the rain "Oh, Molto Bene" he laughed at no one in particular, "Molto Bene!"


	7. Chapter 4: The Doctor Lies

"You're in love with her, aren't you?" Sylvia asked when she sat down next to him.

"I wouldn't say that."

"No use trying to pull the wool over my eyes. I don't miss a trick."

The Doctor remained still.

"And silence won't work either. You only clam up when you think I'm right."

 _Blimey!_

"What am I supposed to say?"

"Why don't you just admit it?"

"She's my best friend, of course I love her."

"That's not what I asked. I asked if you were IN love with her. There's a difference."

"Not to me."

He lied. He knew very well there was a difference! He loved Martha. He loved Rose. At one time he thought he was in love with Rose. But when he met Donna, he knew that what he felt for Rose was just infatuation. She was young, blonde and hung on his every word. Who wouldn't be infatuated with that? Life with Rose was like a sugar rush: thrilling at first, but quickly dissipated. Didn't last. Didn't satisfy. Now Donna on the other hand...every moment with her satisfied him. Even the tiniest ones. Meat and potatoes kind of moments.

Yes he lied. Because he only just discovered how he felt about Donna. He wanted to discuss it with her first, not her mother! Once Donna remembered him, he imagined the conversation would go something like this:

"I missed you."

"I imagine you did. How long was I gone?"

"Too long."

"Didn't it drive you mad?"

"Oh. Well. I've always been mad."

"That's certainly true," she'd laugh. "Seriously though, Mum said you waited a long time for me to come 'round."

"What else did your mother say?"

"Nothing really. Just that you waited. So it's true then?"

"Yes, it is."

"Why?"

"Because...you're special."

Then she'd bristle and say, "I'm really not! Why does everybody keep saying that?!"

"Because you are."

"What do they see that I don't?"

"Come here, I'll show you." He'd take her by the hand and make her stand in front of the oval mirror near her front door. He'd stand behind her so she couldn't bolt. "Look at yourself. What do you see?"

"A temp from Chiswick who can't find a full time job or keep a boyfriend longer than six months. Someone who disappoints her mother no matter how hard she tries. Just a big failure. There, you satisfied?"

"You wanna know what _I_ see?"

She'd hesitate and not dare look him in the eye. "What?"

"I see a woman who keeps on trying no matter how often life or her mother puts her down. I see a woman who tried to save thousands from dying in Pompeii. A woman who can't stand to see others exploited, like the Ood or humans being used as surrogates. I see a woman who, _because she was a temp_ not only noticed an empty file at the Atmos factory, but singlehandedly saved everyone in the universe from the Dalek's reality bomb."

And before she could get a word in edgewise, he'd continue, "But Donna, even with all those wonderful things, they aren't the reason why you're so special." He'd grab both of her shoulders, lean in to look into her reflection's eye and whisper in her ear. "It's because, out of all the women in the universe, you are the only one both of my hearts fell in love with. You are the most important woman in the universe _to me_ , and the only one I would rewrite time for."

Then she'd turn around, wipe the tears from his cheeks and gaze into his eyes and...

 **Slap!**

He winced at the pain and looked up. Donna was no longer there. Nor was he standing in front of the mirror. Instead, he saw Sylvia sitting beside him on the bench. _Oh yes, we were having a conversation, weren't we? Oops._

"For goodness' sake! Do you honestly think you can lie to a mother?"

"What? I'm not lying."

"You were just daydreaming about her, weren't you?"

Silence.

"I'm sorry, Sylvia," He stood up slowly. "We'll have to finish this conversation another time. I just remembered something I need to do."

It was a lie the moment he said it. He didn't wait for her to respond before he walked away.

"I do have eyes, you know," she called after him. "You might as well wear a T-shirt that says 'I love Donna Noble' written all over it."

He whistled to himself and kept on walking. Not because he lied, or that he wanted to drown her grating voice (well, maybe a little bit), but because he suddenly had the urge to make a pot of his signature coffee.


	8. Chapter 5: Coffee 2

Dressed in a white lab coat amidst all of his bubbling pots and smoking glass beakers, the Doctor looked more like some mad scientist playing with his chemistry set than brewing coffee in his kitchen. Sacks of coffee beans labeled Awe, Anticipation, Bitterness, and Melancholy, among others, littered the counter around him. Metal scoops rested in them waiting to be used. Possibly twice. Just in case he messed it up. Again. A long time ago, one of his companions actually suggested he write the formula down. He smirked and shook his head in remembrance. Follow a recipe? How rubbish is that!?

He tasted his current concoction. _So close, so close! It needs something..._ he fumbled thru his array of spices. _Where is it? There you are!_ He grabbed Affection and added a dash to the pot. Then two. Stirred for exactly five seconds then tasted it again. "Oh my! I've outdone myself. Donna is gonna love this!"

* * *

"Smiley! How are you today?"

"Very good."

"Well that's nice, then."

He offered her the steaming cup.

What's this?

"Coffee."

"You must have read my mind. Thank you."

"You're welcome". He eyed her patiently, or rather impatiently, as he anticipated her response. _Wait for it...wait for it…_

She squealed in delight. He smiled and gloated a little. Not that there was anyone to see him gloat.

"This is lovely! Where did you get this?"

"My own." He confessed with a cheeky grin.

"That is so not fair. Ok, you are going to have to bring me one of these every day, or we can't be friends anymore. Seriously?! You've ruined all coffee for me now. I'm only going to crave this stuff. Skinny Bastard!"

He laughed again. _Skinny Bastard! I have half a mind to call it that. Blimey! I'm gonna do it anyway._ He was about to say "what do think about that Donna..." When he caught her looking at him. More like studying him than looking.

 _What? What does she see?_

Then it came to him: _Skinny Bastard_!

A memory forced its way into his thoughts. The day Donna met Martha at the ATMOS factory. He thought they'd argue, but they just talked casually. Before long these words spewed out from Donna's mouth: "He is too skinny for words. You give him a hug, you get a paper cut."

Now, he knew Donna agreed to travel with him on the understanding that they were only friends. But he chalked it up to things you say in the heat of the moment. Stuff you don't really mean. However, when she told Martha "You give him a hug, you get a paper cut," that was when he knew he did not measure up to her standard. And it hurt. Just a bit. He wanted to say, "Time Lord, last of my kind. I travel thru space and time, how could I not be up to your standard?" But he ignored it like he did all the other things he found a little too painful to bear. _It doesn't matter. I just wanted a mate anyway._

 _ **You give him a hug, you get a paper cut. You give him a hug, you get a paper cut.**_

Like a broken record, it kept repeating over and over in his mind. He shook his head in an effort to loosen the memory's grip. He squirmed looking for a way to escape.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Go ahead. "Nothing _like a question to drown the memories._

"Why are you at this bus every time I get here?"

He expected this question and gave the practiced response. "Just waiting."

"For the bus? Do you ever get on it?"

"Not yet."

"Then why are you here every day?"

"Just waiting."

"Waiting for what?"

"My friend."

"Do they ever come?"

"Not yet."

He hung his head and avoided her gaze. _If I look at you right now, I am gonna to lose it._ He pulled out his sonic screwdriver and fidgeted with it instead.

 _Well,_ _ **you**_ _have come to this bus stop every day, but_ _ **she**_ _hasn't. You are amazing, but I miss_ _ **her.**_ _I miss the Donna that knows me. That tells me I'm being a jerk. That argues with me. That...challenges me._ He thought of the times she did all these things. There were so many instances. He cherished them all. _When will you come back to me?_ He looked up at her, but she was gone.

In the background he could vaguely hear the screech of the bus as it stopped at the next block down.

 _Had it really come and gone without my notice?_ _Blimey!_


	9. Chapter 6: The Man Who Waited

"How long have you been waiting?" She asked.

The Doctor jumped. Ever so slightly. Not that Donna would notice.  
"Not long," he said.  
"Not for me, you silly man," she said as she sat down beside him. "For your friend."  
"A while." _Plus a month._  
"That isn't an answer. Or the one I want. How long?"  
He paused, hoping she wouldn't push the issue.  
She waited.  
"Today?" he asked.  
"Yes, today."  
"A few ...hours."  
"How long do you stay after I leave?"

"Not long." _From the time you get on the bus until you come back. It's like a job. Blimey, it IS my job. I have a job, like an ordinary person..._  
"Not this again. How long?"  
"Another hour, maybe." _Yeah, maybe._  
"Do you do this every day?"  
"Of course. Yes." _What else would I be doing_?  
"Why?"  
"Because. Well...she's..."  
"It's a she then?"

 _Blimey._ "Yes, it is. "  
"Because you… love her?"  
"Ah, well..." _The truth? Blimey, here goes nothing_ , "yeah."

He cringed inside while he waited for her response.

And waited…and waited…

 _Awkward_!

He absently pulled out his sonic screwdriver and began to play with it to avoid looking her in the eye. A purple second later, he realized his mistake. _I'm sorry, I'm so sorry..._ he looked at her expectantly. She only looked confused. There was no indication that her mind was on fire. _You're... You're_ fine _? How can you see this sonic screwdriver and be fine? That isn't possible. You should be..._

"Ok. I get why you wait for her. But why do you wait so long?"

 _My screwdriver is right under your nose and_ **that's** _what you're focusing on? Blimey._ "Never know when."  
"You never know when she's coming?"  
He nodded.  
"So you wait here for hours hoping it'll be today?"  
 _Bingo!_ He nodded again.  
"Has she ever come?"  
 _Aye, there's the rub_. His head lowered in resignation. "No, she hasn't."  
"How long have you been doing this?"  
 _I told you before._ "A few hours…"  
"No, that's not what I meant. How many days, weeks or months have you been doing this? Waiting for her to come?"  
"Ugh, little longer"...y _ou really don't want to know..._  
"Years?! Are you telling me it's years?"  
"Yeah. Some...years." _Sure, we'll go with that._  
"You have got to be kidding me! Years? Oh honey, you need to move on. If she hasn't come yet, she's never going to."  
"No. She will." _You've come this far without burning. That means there's still hope._ _  
_"I don't think so." She shook her head slowly, "I really don't."

He smiled and blatantly toyed with the screwdriver again. _Something tells me that the more you see this, the faster your mind will heal._

"Give her time," he said.

 _Not much time. No, not much time at all._ His smile widened into a cheeky grin.


	10. Chapter 7: Bigger On The Inside

"How much time are you willing to give her?" Donna asked.

"As much as she needs." The Doctor answered. _All of space and time if required._

"Where does she live?"

"Not too far away." He nonchalantly rested his hand on his chest. _In one of these hearts of mine. Or is it both?_

"Can't you go to her instead?"

"She has to come to me." _Please do it soon. I've been alone many times before. Only this is different._

"But why?"

He said nothing. Just stared off into space.

 _I can't stand to be in the Tardis for very long. It's so much bigger on the inside without you. Even the loneliness is bigger. And the silence is overwhelming. Why do you think I spend all my time out here on this bench?_ He sighed.

"I just don't want to see you get hurt."

 _Too late for that._ "It's complicated." He exhaled a slow breath and continued, "When she's ready."

 _It would be a nightmare if I had to wait for anyone else. But, for you, I'd wait forever._

"That may be a very long time."

 _It already has been. But not much longer._ "Nah. She's going to come soon."

"How soon?"

"Very soon." _And when you do...let's just say…_

For some reason unbeknownst to him, the air got a little thicker and the atmosphere suddenly got a little awkward between them. _What have I done_ _ **this**_ _time?_

"What happens when she does come?" she asked at little too seriously than he would have liked.

"What do you mean?" _I'm really confused. Why are you so solemn?_

She seemed to select her words with care and said "Will I ever see you again?"

 _Hunh? Why in the world wouldn't I?_

That's when it registered in that thick, overgrown head of his what she really meant.

 _Well, I'll be Gobsmacked!_

At that sacred moment, he realized that he just gained more ground with her than he ever expected. Not with her mind, but with her heart. _Could it be that she has real, true, honest feelings for me?_ His hearts blazed with joy and lit up his whole face in a wide smile.

"Of course!" he said. _You won't be able to get rid of me. And fair warning:_ _I don't think I will be able restrain myself. I'll either hug you 'til I cry, or you cry or we both laugh 'til it hurts. Or maybe, maybe I'll even have the nerve to kiss you. Or all of the above. At once. Or..._

"Ok, Smiley. If I can't talk you out of it, then I'll wait with you. Well, not the whole time, mind. Just some of it. While I'm here waiting for work. Oh you know what I mean." She elbowed him in the rib and he smiled back.

How long had it been since she bantered with him like that?! It filled his hearts with so much hope, so much longing and so much joy, it welled into a tear at the corner of his eye. He quickly brushed it away before she saw it. _She's almost back. Almost._

She looked at him strangely.

 _Did she just wink!?_


End file.
